Where in your life might you be putting work before wonder?
The final day of 30 Days of Yule corresponded with the first day of the Womanrunes Immersion course. The first rune we study is The Tree. The Tree is special to me because I wrote the Womanrunes book surrounded by trees, in my sacred space in the woods behind my house. I was “named and claimed” by the woods in this way and they are my spiritual home, place of respite, solace, and restoration. My soul is replenished by my daily woodspractice.
I didn’t post immediately after reading the “work before wonder” prompt, but not because it didn’t resonate, rather that I thought about the question of work before wonder all day. I am the kind of person who always does what she “should” do first and it can be easy to miss out on wonder that way! That’s one reason why I’m recommitting to my 365 days in the woods Woodspriestess practice this year. I HAVE to allow myself to put the practices that nourish and restore me first–or, at least move them up in the day.
At the same time, I thought of my kids, my “magical giftbringers.” How often they need my attention and it is only half available to them because I always have so much to do in a day. But, then I also allowed myself to tune in to and appreciate the times I do enjoy wonder with them every day–and maybe don’t give myself credit for, caught up in the barrage of “should do’s” plus maternal guilt that tends to haunt many days. We have a home based life. We homeschool and we work from home–I spend 90% of my waking hours in the company of my family + 100% of my sleeping hours in the company of my youngest who sleeps in my arms all night long. Paradoxically, it can be hard to be “present” in the face of that much togetherness!
So, I took some moments to notice and bask in wonder. All four of them lined up waiting for me to read to them at bedtime.
My arm curled around the baby as he fell asleep at naptime that afternoon. No matter how I might feel “not enough” in the course of any one day, it must be a pretty nice life to fall asleep on your mother’s chest–hugging you and smelling your hair.
The final picture was taken on Christmas, but I included it here because that is the, “pick me up” face I see every day and it has a background of gifts, which seems symbolic and appropriate.
Yep, of course I picked him up! But, I wanted to remember what it looks/feels like to have a little person reaching for me. It seems so commonplace and never-ending. I’ve had little people reaching for me with a very similar face for 12 years and counting. But, this is the last baby. And, the days of the intensive need for mothering will pass and this face and this reaching will be a memory and a past spin on my own wheel of life.